Anger Management Tools that have helped me.
I Pray that GOD will help you use and adapt these tools to suit your anger management needs.
1.PRAYER without ceasing (Both literally and as an acrostic)
Pray before every encounter, phone call or anything actually.
1 Thessalonians 5:17 Pray without ceasing.
Retain (Listen) what the other person is saying.
James 1:19 My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry,
Attend to the other person's needs where applicable.
Luke 6:31 "Do to others as you would have them do to you."
You - truthfully look at your responsibility to GOD in this matter. Your Actions. Could there be an internal cause of this issue for You?
James 4:1 What causes fights and quarrels amoung you? Don't they come from your desires that battle within you?
Examine the situation and see what is your part and your responsibility
Lamentations 3:40 Let us examine our ways and test them and then return to the Lord.
Resolve - Peacefully. If you are wrong admit it and make amends don’t be defensive (Being Defensive has always caused me more problems.). If you are truly not part of the issue the other person is raising then agree to disagree and let it go and then pray silently that God will resolve the problem.
Ephesians 4:26 "In your anger do not sin" : Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry.
2. Quiet time alone with God each day
3. Reading the Bible and using scripture and Jesus' example as a guide for my life. Read corresponding Proverbs Chapter for whatever day Calendar Day it is.
4. Create A Mission Statement: My Mission Statement: I am a GREATFUL Servant of CHRIST JESUS following GOD’s will for my life. Worshiping and trusting him with all my heart, mind, and soul. And through GOD’s grace, loving, praying, being a blessing, and adding value to my, Family, Friends, Company, Customers, and anyone else GOD sees fit to send my way.
5. Use a filter for every decision.
A. Does the decision conflict with My Mission Statement ?
Q1. if yes come up with a new decision
Q2. if no then then proceed to next Letter
B. Does the decision conflict with my long term goal in this situation? refer to Q1 and Q2
C. Does the decision conflict with my short term goal in this situation? refer to Q1 and Q2
D. Make Decision
6. Put in me what I want to come out of me.
Church, Christian Fellowship, Christian Literature, Christian Music
7. Bio Feedback Equipment
A. Audio Meter (I use an Audio meter when I'm alone to practice and be aware of my volume. I also use this in known high energy situations to keep my tone low and manageable.) Purchased at Radio Shack
B. Pulse Monitors (When my pulse gets up I ask for a moment then breathe deep breaths to get it to a lower level)
C. Stop Watch to make sure I don't get carried away and go on and on.
8. Understanding that everyone thinks and processes things differently and make allowances for other's ways of processing and excepting them for who they are.
9. Actively working my recovery through Celebrate Recovery and Volunteerism (Taking the I out of the center of my life because I is always the center of sIn and prIde.)
10. Letting GO! More and More just being quiet and praying not looking to get my way.
GUILT vs SHAME
Guilt, I believe, is GOD’s perfect tool to gain our attention and prick our spirit and causes us, if we submit to it, to turn and repent from our sin. Once we repent and ask forgiveness from GOD, the person we harmed (when to do so will not harm them or re injury them), and ourselves (A step usually skipped because of the lie of SHAME). Then we, because of CHRIST’s payment for our sins, except his redemption and forgiveness and are FREE. satan is the great deceiver. He never has created anything. He has taken what GOD meant for glory (quilt) and added a lie (SHAME). satan has taken guilt + the lie that we are never free of that sin we committed and we are not worthy of forgiveness. Once we have asked for forgiveness and repented (walking in a different direction from our sin that we are asking forgiveness for). By the blood of Christ we are FREE from all condemnation. The magnificent creator of the entire universe in his infinite wisdom decided to come to earth and take on human form and be a living example of his word, the bible, and live a perfect life only to pay an excruciating price, crucifixion, to FREE us from sin and eternal damnation. When we ask for forgiveness and do not except that forgiveness by continuing to live in SHAME. FORGIVENESS which was paid for by the blood of the only one among us ever to walk a perfect path JESUS. I believe we buy into the satan's lie that we are not worthy of forgiveness. We live a miserable life saying to JESUS you have said by your actions living perfect and of dying and paying the price for sin that we are worthy of forgiveness from you and that being true, then who are we to live in satan’s lie of SHAME and not forgiving ourselves. Who are we that GOD has seen fit to forgive us but WE see fit not to forgive ourselves. We must except CHRIST’S sacrifice and except forgiveness. PLEASE Commit to live a rejoice filled life happy and free of the lie of SHAME and except JESUS' PAYMENT FOR OUR FORGIVENESS.
Pray before every encounter, phone call or anything actually.
1 Thessalonians 5:17 Pray without ceasing.
Retain (Listen) what the other person is saying.
James 1:19 My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry,
Attend to the other person's needs where applicable.
Luke 6:31 "Do to others as you would have them do to you."
You - truthfully look at your responsibility to GOD in this matter. Your Actions. Could there be an internal cause of this issue for You?
James 4:1 What causes fights and quarrels amoung you? Don't they come from your desires that battle within you?
Examine the situation and see what is your part and your responsibility
Lamentations 3:40 Let us examine our ways and test them and then return to the Lord.
Resolve - Peacefully. If you are wrong admit it and make amends don’t be defensive (Being Defensive has always caused me more problems.). If you are truly not part of the issue the other person is raising then agree to disagree and let it go and then pray silently that God will resolve the problem.
Ephesians 4:26 "In your anger do not sin" : Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry.
2. Quiet time alone with God each day
3. Reading the Bible and using scripture and Jesus' example as a guide for my life. Read corresponding Proverbs Chapter for whatever day Calendar Day it is.
4. Create A Mission Statement: My Mission Statement: I am a GREATFUL Servant of CHRIST JESUS following GOD’s will for my life. Worshiping and trusting him with all my heart, mind, and soul. And through GOD’s grace, loving, praying, being a blessing, and adding value to my, Family, Friends, Company, Customers, and anyone else GOD sees fit to send my way.
5. Use a filter for every decision.
A. Does the decision conflict with My Mission Statement ?
Q1. if yes come up with a new decision
Q2. if no then then proceed to next Letter
B. Does the decision conflict with my long term goal in this situation? refer to Q1 and Q2
C. Does the decision conflict with my short term goal in this situation? refer to Q1 and Q2
D. Make Decision
6. Put in me what I want to come out of me.
Church, Christian Fellowship, Christian Literature, Christian Music
7. Bio Feedback Equipment
A. Audio Meter (I use an Audio meter when I'm alone to practice and be aware of my volume. I also use this in known high energy situations to keep my tone low and manageable.) Purchased at Radio Shack
B. Pulse Monitors (When my pulse gets up I ask for a moment then breathe deep breaths to get it to a lower level)
C. Stop Watch to make sure I don't get carried away and go on and on.
8. Understanding that everyone thinks and processes things differently and make allowances for other's ways of processing and excepting them for who they are.
9. Actively working my recovery through Celebrate Recovery and Volunteerism (Taking the I out of the center of my life because I is always the center of sIn and prIde.)
10. Letting GO! More and More just being quiet and praying not looking to get my way.
GUILT vs SHAME
Guilt, I believe, is GOD’s perfect tool to gain our attention and prick our spirit and causes us, if we submit to it, to turn and repent from our sin. Once we repent and ask forgiveness from GOD, the person we harmed (when to do so will not harm them or re injury them), and ourselves (A step usually skipped because of the lie of SHAME). Then we, because of CHRIST’s payment for our sins, except his redemption and forgiveness and are FREE. satan is the great deceiver. He never has created anything. He has taken what GOD meant for glory (quilt) and added a lie (SHAME). satan has taken guilt + the lie that we are never free of that sin we committed and we are not worthy of forgiveness. Once we have asked for forgiveness and repented (walking in a different direction from our sin that we are asking forgiveness for). By the blood of Christ we are FREE from all condemnation. The magnificent creator of the entire universe in his infinite wisdom decided to come to earth and take on human form and be a living example of his word, the bible, and live a perfect life only to pay an excruciating price, crucifixion, to FREE us from sin and eternal damnation. When we ask for forgiveness and do not except that forgiveness by continuing to live in SHAME. FORGIVENESS which was paid for by the blood of the only one among us ever to walk a perfect path JESUS. I believe we buy into the satan's lie that we are not worthy of forgiveness. We live a miserable life saying to JESUS you have said by your actions living perfect and of dying and paying the price for sin that we are worthy of forgiveness from you and that being true, then who are we to live in satan’s lie of SHAME and not forgiving ourselves. Who are we that GOD has seen fit to forgive us but WE see fit not to forgive ourselves. We must except CHRIST’S sacrifice and except forgiveness. PLEASE Commit to live a rejoice filled life happy and free of the lie of SHAME and except JESUS' PAYMENT FOR OUR FORGIVENESS.